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7 Secret Symbols of the Swinging Community

The Swinging Community has always been a secretive, discreet world where members connect based on mutual trust and shared interests. Over the years, certain symbols have emerged within this community to help members identify one another without necessarily outing themselves to those outside the lifestyle.

Here are seven symbols commonly associated with swingers:

What Do Swingers Do?

Swingers often attend parties or meet-ups, known as “swinger parties” or “swinger clubs.” But these aren’t your average potluck dinners. Think of them more as adult buffets where the menu is diverse, and you’re encouraged to sample a bit of this and a bit of that.

No, it’s not about exchanging recipes or gardening tips. The central activity in swinging is “swapping” partners for intimate encounters. There are different types of swaps, like the “soft swap” (limited to kissing and touching) or the “full swap” (going all the way).

Choose your own adventure!

Do Swingers Put Their Keys in a Bowl?

Ah, the old “keys in a bowl” trope. It’s one of those urban legends that’s been swirling around the swinger community for decades, like an elusive unicorn at a mythical party. But is there truth behind this often-repeated image?

The idea of “key parties” is thought to have its roots in the 1970s, during the sexual revolution in the U.S. The basic premise goes like this: couples would arrive at a party, the men would place their car keys into a communal bowl, and at the end of the night, women would draw a set of keys at random. Whosever keys she drew would be her partner for the evening.

While the concept makes for tantalizing movie scenes and dramatic stories, most swingers today will tell you that “key parties” are more legend than practice.

Many in the swinging community have never attended such a party and might even find the idea a bit outdated.

In reality, modern swinging strongly emphasizes consent, communication, and mutual attraction, none of which aligns with the randomness of drawing keys from a bowl.

The Symbols:

The Black Ring

Often worn on the right ring finger, the black ring is a subtle indicator that the wearer may be involved in the swinging lifestyle. It’s a discreet way for swingers to identify themselves to others in the know without drawing unnecessary attention.


Believe it or not, the pineapple has become a rather iconic symbol in the swinging community. Upside-down pineapples in particular, whether displayed as a door knocker, ornament, or even on clothing, can be a signifier. The theory is that an upside-down pineapple symbolizes a person is out of the ordinary or is looking to flip things around in their relationship.

The Swinger’s Symbol (“The Swing”):

This is a more overt symbol, with two interlocking male and female signs forming a stylized S. Jewelry, tattoos, or stickers featuring this symbol are typically a clear sign of someone actively identifying as part of the community.

White Rocks

In some neighborhoods, white rocks placed outside a house, especially in a front yard or by a mailbox, indicate that the homeowners might be swingers.

However, this can vary by region and can overlap with other cultural or decorative choices, so it’s not always a definitive sign.

Garden Gnomes:

Much like the white rocks, some believe that a garden gnome can be a sign of a swinger household. While gnomes are a popular garden decoration worldwide, in certain contexts or paired with other symbols, they might indicate something more.

The Anchor Symbol:

The anchor has also been adopted as a subtle symbol for some in the swinging community. Often, jewelry with an anchor, especially when combined with other symbols like the swinger’s symbol or certain colors, can denote a connection to the lifestyle.

Bracelets and Wristbands:

Color-coded bracelets or wristbands might sometimes be worn by swingers at events or clubs to indicate specific interests or boundaries.

For instance, a certain color might suggest that a person is looking for a soft swap (no intercourse) rather than a full swap. These can be especially useful at events where direct communication might be challenging due to noise or other factors.

To Swing or Not?

While these symbols can help those in the swinging community discreetly identify potential partners, it’s crucial to approach with respect and discretion. Just like with any other community, consent and open communication are paramount.

Moreover, it’s essential to remember that not everyone displaying these symbols may be involved in the lifestyle; many might appreciate the aesthetic or have other personal reasons for their choices.

Finally, if you’re ever curious or interested in understanding more about a person’s affiliations or lifestyle choices, the best approach is always direct, respectful conversation.

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